CarolineGerardo haiku, photos, journal

Thursday, April 3, 2014

Harvard bookstore on valentines day


I love the smell of stacks
To sit on a rolly stool
To get a paper cut
To hold a story
in my hands


Thursday, March 13, 2014

Family Jewels

Vulture Family Tree
They mate for life.
Mother went up for atrial stenosis surgery
UCLA sent her home
Some emergency...
Vultures soar on thermals with their kin
I see my tree moving away
After building a dynasty
Plucked to DNA thin.
Then Healed by time.
PTSD soldier resting on a limb.
Surrounded by almond blossoms with heady fragrance.
Perfumers’ choose frankincense, the notes sing a familiar song.
Grandma’s cologne causes sleeplessness.
I miss the girlies.
In their growth.
In their journeys.
I love them as my own
Barberries, pomegranate seeds and
chunky ruby beads repair a broken spirit.
My brother witnessed his heart on a table.
The anesthesiologist gave him remedy.
A pump kept him going.
A California condor elegy?
Find a breeding program for positivity.

Our Lady of Guadalupe Jewelry
Vulture photograph from my trip to Africa

Friday, March 7, 2014

Run For Your Life

Hanging Lake

Run For Your Life

You finished hundreds of triathlons.

The days ahead look dark.

You don’t have enough:

money, strength, business, chances,

lawyers, equity, outs, luck, and do- overs.

It seems.

Writing on the shower wall,

in the steam, sums of numbers might

fix the problems.

In the moonlight you lose that thread

on the last button and think of quitting.

Mind hurting and body tripping-

Do not give up.

I will be a better friend and lover.

With the patience of a Buddha smile,

Wisdom of words to make it

All better.

It’s a dandelion wish fuzzy and full of

wind to make it fly.

I will get up and try again.

I miss your breath next to me,

I long to hear you snore.

I will be more.

I love you my dear heart.

Here is the winning lotto ticket, keep it dry.

Say it out loud with me,

hearing your

plan for confident recovery for bountiful success,

is half the race.

“I will overcome.”

Forget the crows, the State Board, the negativity,

and broken glass along the trail.

You made it up the God Damn hill before.

This process tears at every muscle you own:

You will overcome.

I will be a better friend.

I am here listening to your heart.

When I send befuddled messages know –

I miss you.

To hear your breathing hard after the long climb to the finish line.

I believe in you.

You are my Superman.

Caroline Gerardo

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Share Your Heart


Heart Snowman at Harvard Business School

Carson and Nori at Harvard Business School

Carson in front of old Stock Exchange Ticker

Mixed emotions of a weary  and joyful traveler.

Early November I made travel plans to take my youngest on the “college tour.” I booked flight arrangements as cheaply and efficiently as a miserly C. P A. for Boston, New York, Minneapolis, Austin and D. C. (We can drive to San Francisco)  Each stop, like a book tour,  arranged around my son's winter and spring holidays. Little did I know in November that I would overlap my chemotherapy appointments.

I am sticking to the schedule. Having a next stop gives me a light ahead. When I’m running, I make a goal on the horizon and bargain with myself to keep going until that certain tree. Breathe, do the work, and soon I find myself there. The body forgets the pain. The mind achieves the goal. The willow bends it branches behind me in inspiration.

The highlight of our journey, thus far, was seeing my sister teaching her class at Harvard Business School on Valentine’s Day. It may not be your usual expectation of romantic endearment. I was proud of her and joyful that my seventeen year old could get a picture in his mind of that tree on the horizon. What we demonstrate is more important than what we say. My greatest accomplishment is my children. 

Show  your heart today ~ snow geese guide each other well ~ fly in the first rung.




Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Mistletoe For Christmas

It is Christmas season. I like to make something to share with those around me. The memory of mistletoe in a plastic baggy sold by Boy Scouts at a tree lot forever ago inspired this post.
I am a hiker of the canyons. Local mountains have oak and sycamore trees that are hosts for mistletoe. They appear low enough to pluck but- I know better.What appears within reach from a distance is going to be a project. In Wyoming we used to shoot them down with a 22 to stop the parasite from weighing down apple trees. Here in California, I don't think the rangers would let me go without some monetary fine for shooting in designated natural areas.
In my mind I am still sixteen. I decided to climb the sycamores and knock down mistletoe for my project. The first attempt failed. An owl watched me without laughing.
My second trip I was prepared. I brought my ten essentials and: climbing rappelling ropes, a scythe for cutting and a short pole. The trick was to appear as any normal hiker ( using the stick like a walking aid).
I got up the tree easily but dropped the cutting tool in the first attempt. Wish I brought extra paracord to tie to the moon shaped cutter and just toss it over a branch before I started my second ascent. The scythe would be hanging ready like a Christmas ornament if only I had more rope.
After successfully gathering the green boughs I quietly carried them to the back of my car. It began to rain. Rain in California is a blessing. I placed the branches and leaves on my front porch to enjoy the clean off from the mist that evening. To my surprise the next morning the mistletoe had begun to turn light brown. Within a day it turned charcoal.
There must be some secret emerald glycerin those Scouts used... I brought the branches into the garage and experimented with left over gold and silver metallic spray paint. I wasn't that pleased with the first results. 

 I had some plaster of Paris in the craft bins, some glitter, iridescent modge podge and old grocery bags for the next part of my "project." I believe mistletoe is poisonous or so the Nordic legend with the arrow goes, but that's another story... I covered my kitchen counters and saved a few trimmings to keep the mistletoe from sticking to the paper.

See how dark and brittle it became in two days--
Old paint brush, recycled plastic container and recycled plastic spoon and fork. Keep the spoon dry and use the fork for stirring in the plastic cup. I ended up using my hands. Using my fingers was better because I could judge the plaster to be more liquid than toothpaste and firmer than cream. I did not measure. This is fun not work.

Above is a photo (all pics from my iphone) of my snowy white and green mistletoe. When they dried they were less fragile. I saved even the brown paper- I will use it as wrapping paper. The stencils of the mistletoe on the brown paper were graceful. The shadows of the mistletoe on my printed papers (saved from when I printed two parts of the Bible for my son Carson's school project) might also make some pretty cards.
If you receive one of my funky crafts this Christmas you will know they are made with love and a process like no other. My Pinterest friends would be proud. When I get them into glass ornaments I will post some more images. 

I read this formula that if you sell something on Etsy that costs X 2 plus labor X 2 = wholesale value. I spent a little on gas driving there but all my materials are from recycled things or left overs. But my time well that's priceless times two
For more mistletoe stories, Nordic lore, Christmas meaning of mistletoe - The Farmer's Almanac is very helpful
see here

In case you need a home mortgage : baby needs new shoes for Christmas