Botanic Gardens, Santa Barbara

Chromometer, an antique method to measure the blue in the sky.

Spring day rates a million at SB botanic garden, sharing the joy... 

Get Christmas Lights

Get Christmas Lights

Give hope now. 

Generator moans

Girlfriend harass

Good god where?

 Jesus wraps presents

Gentle storage boxes

Gift me Target crates

Gadflies of plastic fills

Greet strangers with joys

Gems of sapphire lights

Golly snap your negatives

Glue of one day remains

Get galactic Grinch gone 

Gadgets waste of dollars

Greet every cell with smile

Caroline Gerardo Copyright 12/23/2016 poem and images 

Nighthawk Rodeo

Nighthawk Rodeo 

Talk negative multiplies 

ranch dogs escape midnight

Talk negative multiplies

moon works to break clouds 

Jefferson, a male, creates holes

 bull with a rope at his privates

 time for a party say the puppies

 escape artists have no worries

 boy's 12 gauge fire crackers

boots on for two step dances.

Talk negative multiplies

free ticket watch for coyote

Talk negative multiplies

jerky treats, not our dogs 

 I'm a Mom with kindness

come chase nighthawks

flashlights on hooting owls

no worry muddy pajamas

brave thunder silly hats

share joy seeps in souls.

Nighthawk Rodeo Poem

copyright Caroline Gerardo

November 20. 2016

Joy Arises

Joy Arises

Recite rosary daily.
Sleep is not with me.
Opened memory boxes hidden in the garage.
Attempted to lighten my load of belongings.
I photographed their muddy artworks,
throwing out the dog eared originals. As I lingered
over my children's photos - pictures of ponies and
streamers in gold green and auburn revealing
- colors of time.
Boxes worn.
I cut down to two tattered boxes.
Label: "IMPORTANT FRAGILE"

Piles of trophies, sports jerseys and awards
posed for pictures. Filed them in icloud and
Google photo in case I lose sight of the images.
Thirty Yearbooks now in storage for
my kids homes of their own. When I peeked,
I couldn't recall the names signed with faces.
"Hey buddy you are great!!!" Love,Tanya.

High School reunion is marked on my calendar.
Hope to make it to my first one this year in July.
Will I match peoples names with their images?

A boy promised take me to prom then never showed up.
I know his name, not saying it, never hold in
your mind an unpleasant event.
Let it fly and begin again.

Happiness isn't dusty boxes or antique silver.

Letting go half the things I filled in my house.
Grateful.
A big gesture to
mark this change.
Downsize to a simple path.
Not juggling two jobs, writing at dawn, fighting
with tenants to do what's right.

A joy gift to mark my new life.
I placed an advertisement on #Freecycle with pictures of
my family room furniture. Freecycle is a website where
members post their requests or offer free items.
It Read:
All this for you. A single mom deserves these.
Borrow a truck or two and strong helpers.
Be prepared to accept everything.
Don't text me. Call to make arrangements.
Many texted, emailed and few called.
Each with their requirements.
"I can come next week, but I only want the
antique table." - I didn't answer.
"Will you deliver to me?" Nope.
"Is that a real Tufft table?" Yep.
The right call arrived. I gave them
my address. She asks, "what do you want in
return?"
"For you to be joyful."
They arrive with two funky trucks.
Grandmother's chairs, dining table, ikea
sofa with two new covers, mid century modern
coffee table, Tufft table not in great condition,
Regency writing desk, and linens flow from
my house to their vehicles.
The daughter jumps up and down.
Their excitement makes me giggle.

I am lighter. Ready for my new life.

“It is in the nature of things that joy 
arises in a person free from remorse.”
The Buddha (Cetana Sutta, Anguttara Nikaya)

Caroline Gerardo copyright c   May 3, 2016

Waves Pound Haiku

Fingers hurt from work ~ thousand waves pound my muscles ~ rowing almost there.

It's Friday
I balance three employment activities
You do two things in this gig economy.
292 thousand new jobs added

Looking forward with joy to finishing
the construction work on the house and
downsizing.
Never never never use mastic to glue to drywall
Words of warning
We hung this beautiful blue cork board on son's wall
A mountain where he hung congratulations certificates,
blue ribbons, and photographs of teams and friends.
When he left for college the awards came down.

Misty ocean calls ~ lighthouse horn reminds from far ~ of the happy house.

2 haikus, thoughts and a video to make you smile
Caroline Gerardo
2016

Christmas letter

Dear
Must not have your correct address.
Last I wrote it returned to sender.

Taking the wallpaper down.
Endangered Lady Gouldians danced
on roses in kitchen and family room.
You hated on the toile.
Men saw it as grandmotherly.
Realtor says remove all toys.
Cried not when fingers bled,
at snow white walls superior
to silly frills that create happy.

It won't be my home anymore.
Owners mow heirloom climbers.
Petals look unruly, roll out sod.
Take photos when it's sold.

We have a tiny tree
fuller than a Charlie Brown's,
popcorn strung, cranberries
and cuties with cloves in patterns.
Quite opposite my giant jeweled
Christmas tree of gold.






In the garden hangs a popcorn ball
with peanut butter and thistle seeds.
Care for the song birds.
French braid never gets old.

Christmas wish to your happiness.
I miss you all.




My children grow stronger.
Teaching them to fly.
Academy of independence.
Keep your sense of direction.
Stay the course for joy.

With Love,
Caroline Gerardo 2015 Christmas Poem

Empty Nest

Grief in the plan.

Children's solo guardian: expect change.

But doesn't fit, jeans sizes small. 

Throw out expensive pair or work on body?

Dropped off my son to college four weeks ago.

I didn't cry.

Kept brave.

Days slip stolen by menopause and hackers.

Found lotto tickets never checked.

Liquor store guy says, "old- if you won they won't pay."

Book of Isaiah 65?

Don't offer food and wine to the gods...
bribery spoils luck

Fortunate to adore my children.

Guiltless give them everything.

Pack up worry ~ it weeds no garden.

Revisions on the next book finished.

Begin the next story.

Please Stop by, 

share abundance of zebra striped tomatoes.

I'll give you a bag. 

Pick the herbs you need.
Sage, basil and thyme in gemstone colors.

Just don't call me an empty nester.

Caroline Gerardo
poem October 2015

Nest in the woods

Sending your children off to fly on their own

The rail road path ahead in life

I have a photo of my two on this whale when they were toddlers. Here they are now 2015 in Santa Cruz California

Hike to the waterfall north of Big Sur

On the way  home from dropping off at college hike
Caroline Gerardo Empty Nest Poem
copyright 2015

Joy

Sand in my toes
shake off
foggy sensation weighs in
on the sky and mind
a grain flows
and finds
joy

Photos taken with my iphone 4 in Laguna Beach and Laguna Niguel copyright Caroline Gerardo
May you have simple joy today

Under The Lights

“You'll look out for O’Shea on the field?” His Mother asks in the beginning of the season.

“What number is he?”

“28.”

Dana Hills High School stadium has a peek at an ocean view; but dry rot in the bleachers. An unusual request comes from a tall black lady in this white community.

Lacrosse isn't a popular sport in Orange County. Football reigns in High Schools. The stadium is never full for Lacrosse games.

The Stats Mom who brings snacks on the bus, carries the first aid kit, knows which players have asthma or are allergic to bees or peanut butter asks, “There’s no 28 on the roster?”

“Just got a jersey.” O’Shea’s mother answers.

“Okay. Fill out these forms - your cell phone number, his height, grade…”
The blonde lady pauses, “Permission forms seem like duplication - Coaches don’t see the papers the High School Administration gets.”

“Will do.”

O’Shea attends practices but his parents didn't buy him a stick or pads. Parents pay to have their children play Lacrosse in public schools. Even the bill for the electric lights is paid by fundraising. At games O’Shea stands leaning to his left side wearing his jersey. O’Shea has Intellectual Disabilities and physical limb abnormalities. No one asks the name of his syndrome, the boys accept him as one of the team. His troubles are more visible than other boys on the team. Teenagers struggle to fit in. Perhaps in a wealthy beach community there is more pressure to assimilate.

When Junior Varsity lines up to watch the older boys play, a player shows him where to stand and what cheers to repeat. He learns to honor the opposing team by following the boys.

Gentlemen who choose a sport like LAX (as Lacrosse is nicknamed) may have increased physical drive. Players on the Dana team are rough. Young  men have hormones that drive them to poke each other. This sport allows gentlemen to hit one another with sticks.

O’Shea participates in the pranks they play upon each other. Riding home from a game, Coaches count the boys on the bus, as some impulsively might catch a ride with a buddy. The boys tell O’Shea to duck down. For a few minutes he plays along with the gag that he is forgotten somewhere in Murietta, much to the dismay of the Coach. O'Shea might be left thirty miles from home in the dark.

“Driver go back!” Coach shouts.

Then O’Shea pops up, “Coooch!”

Everyone laughs that O’Shea was not left behind, and also at his progress to enjoy a joke.

“Oh sha oh oh shay,” they cheer.

Unexpected joy changes the boys.

In a home game a week ago, Coach plans to put O’Shea into the J. V. game. O’Shea doesn't physically practice, he attends but only helps on the sideline. It is difficult for him to keep up. Coaches tell San Juan Hills Coach that he will let them score a few goals if they allow O’Shea to play two minutes and not be treated aggressively. San Juan's team misunderstands the communication. Varsity boys loan O'Shea parts of their shoulder pads, arm guards and a stick. On the sidelines they dress him, pulling the arm guards over his elbows. He's padded like the Michelin Man. The referees do not understand what is happening. San Juan’s team do not comprehend the tenderness of treating someone with disability as capable. Only the Dana players know about O’Shea’s disabilities. Few parents understand the dynamic. With gloves and a helmet and his body covered, O'Shea appears under the field lights somewhat like any other player, but his stance and his gate are stiff. As the whistle blows the defensive players circle him and lead him to the fifty yard line. He’s a bit rattled about where to go on the field. O’Shea never played contact LAX or shot the ball. The boys shout instructions.

“We’ll run with you half way. Attacks will take you the rest.”

He says nothing.

“Two hands on your stick O’Shea!” Someone shouts.

The point player and bottom left and right surround him while the Middies protect the ball at the fifty yard line bringing him closer to the crease.

“This way!” They encourage.

O’Shea trembles as he jogs towards the ball on the ground. The boys toss and keep the ball ready, away from opponents for O’Shea’s chance to pick up the ground ball. With assistance, he manages on the second try. The audience cheers. The boys urge him.

“Shoot, shoot!”

The ball does not go in the net; however, all the players on the Dana team raise their arms to indicate a goal. They scream.

“O’Shea!”

The referee whistles some violation. A player tries to explain that O’Shea can’t hold the stick properly with two hands, inside the glove is a hand that is formed like a mitten. The foul is called off.

Coach puts O’Shea in again in the fourth quarter but this time it isn't as dramatic. Winning tonight’s game is sweet.

At the end of the game, the announcer calls the player of the game. A Freshman player runs to find a pen and neatly write “game ball” on a new white ball. O’Shea beams. He holds it above his head. The field lights shine a neon glow.

*
Dana Hills High Lacrosse Team of 2015.
“Mainstreaming” theory believes a disabled person grows with acceptable forms of social interaction. This wonderful inclusion was perhaps one of the vital lessons that the Dana Hills High Gentlemen’s Lacrosse learned this year. Winning is the goal in sports. Growing into a good man is more important. Thank you O’Shea for sharing your heart. Thank you to the amazing men who shared their joy, drive and heart under the Friday night floodlights. 

Our last season game is Thursday, April 30^th at Dana Hills High School Stadium 5:30 Varsity and 7:00 J.V. against El Toro.

Spring Comes

 Spring comes.
Forsythia buried under five feet of snow
but Whole Foods sells peonies I know
Sleep on linens washed in lavender water




















Ordered galvanized beds?
Combed the seed catalogs?

Spring comes

ready or not

Renews all things.

Sprouts despite rust.

Builds nests from sweaters.


Spring comes!

Prepare your heart:

she'll send dandelions

up in shining glory

gold as fresh honey.


Spring delivers

amazing opportunities for you-

opposite of giving up for Lent,

fingers will create

and hearts share joy.


C G
2/19/2015

I'm thinking about gardening.

In California there are no mounds of snow that
crocus seem to melt away. Spring starts
with flycatchers coming back to the creek,
with mourning doves nesting again in my
gazebo and the return of monarch butterflies
to milkweed on the hillside.
I pray for your heart to warm up, may all
your worries be put under your pillow like
those tiny dolls that can eat up the stress.
I keep you in my prayers and heart
for health and what you need.

If anyone wants seeds - email me
I'll mail them snail mail just don't tell
Monsanto. Not that GMO's read poetry.